I admire and respect my wife. For eight years Tabitha taught as a third grade teacher in her hometown. I was with her through the highs, lows, and in-betweens of teaching. Learning that our education system prioritizes/champions testing and scores. That challenges come not only from in the classroom but from outside of it. Taking the form of parents and district representatives. Through it all, her love for educating her students never died. As long as she could close her door and teach, she was happy.
Somewhere along the learning journey we had Wyatt. Tabitha found herself torn between being a mom while working as a teacher. For years, Tab’s mom gave us peace of mind by watching/raising Wyatt. But we lived in that tension of her wanting to stay home. We didn’t think that we could live without dual incomes and the insurance her job provided.
After much time and prayer, we made the decision to keep her home. A decision that has not always been easy but has been good.
Something weird happened when Tabitha became a stay-at-home mom. A cloud of lies settled in that said, “she must not have anything better to do” OR “she needs to be doing something”. My wife became the dumping ground of low paying jobs and babysitting requests.
I am here today, as her husband, to tell you, whoever you are, that my wife’s freedom comes at a cost. She doesn’t have to watch your kids; she doesn’t have to take that babysitting job for the church. If she does watch your kids, she has made that decision to help you out. Not because she has to but because she wants to. As a husband, I love being able to give my wife that freedom. That ability to be a mom, a wife, whoever else she wants to be.
Whether we have just one child or many, that does not change her role. Whether we choose to homeschool or send Wyatt to public school, that does not change her mission. She is still a mom; she is still my wife. I am proud of her. Please leave her alone.
4 thoughts on “Please leave my wife alone”
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OMG! Yikes, sorry that is happening. I learned when my kids went to private preschool that people thought I was some kind of weirdo because I stayed “home” with my kids. This post is interesting to me because i honestly had been thinking it was all in my head of the way people viewed me once they found out i was a SAHM. Yeah I never got fancied up….cudda looked like i cared about myself more….Im quiet. But still.
Anyway, i feel you because I’ve been targeted by SO many people to sell their wares in a triangle scheme that I could spit. It’s extremely infuriating. Yeah, cause i want to WORK FOR YOU when I can barely find time to take a shower! Our situation was the same, we both decided we would be ok if i stayed home and its a choice we made. Just because im a sahm doesn’t mean im looking for fulfillment or any other source of making money. If i was, i would go back to work, duh. Oh man, im going to stop now…this is such a trigger subject to me.
Strangely, since our kids started public….i don’t get that hairy eyeball from anyone anymore or the balking when they find out i “don’t work”.
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Thank you for stopping by and for your comments. One would think that in our modern age thought would be different, more progressive even, but it is not.